Wednesday, June 27, 2007

40 years old

Holy shit...what just happened? Today, I turn 40. Yes, that's FORTY...ten more than 30. I can still remember high school graduation--22 years ago. Where did it go? I have teenage children, and my parents are well into their 60s. It wasn't supposed to happen this fast! I had so many things I wanted to accomplish by the time I reached 40, and so few of them have actually happened. I have seen many foreign countries (check that off)...I have been on a cruise (check)...I have been married and had kids (check). Also, sadly enough, I have lived to see my four grandparents die, as well as my step-grands and grand-in-laws.

Never again will I see the days of staying up all night and sleeping all day. Gone are the days of knocking off a 12 pack and then still being able to function. The music isn't as loud, and the car isn't as fast. I also look back on previous relationships and wonder where it all went. Best friends, girlfriends, party buddies, Army buddies, high school and college acquaintances. Man, there were a bunch, weren't there? Now, we're down to a small handful of friends and the memories of good times past.

I guess as long as I continue to see the top side of the grass, I should be grateful. I just see other 40 year olds and wonder if they have the same dreams and wishes that I have. As I begin to see "mid-life" as a reality, I vow not to become one of those guys who buys a closet full of Hawaiian shirts and buys a hot rod convertible just to try to relive the past. I already own a closet full of T-shirts, which I will continue to wear, and as for the car...give me a Tiburon any day!

I'm about to head out to the local jazz club and have a few beers while I listen to some smooth sax, remembering the days when hair bands ruled the world and I thought I was bulletproof. Funny how things change so much in such a short time. Until next time...

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